How to Change an Unhelpful Habit: 3 Practical Steps

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Changing an unwanted habit is easier when you understand what keeps it going. A habit may be tied to a particular time of day, emotion, environment, social situation, or immediate reward. Rather than relying only on willpower, it can help to slow the pattern down and look at what happens before, during, and after the behaviour.

Here are three practical steps.

1. Identify the Situations That Trigger the Habit

Start by noticing when the behaviour is most likely to happen.

Ask yourself:

• What was happening immediately beforehand?
• Where was I?
• Who was I with?
• What was I feeling physically or emotionally?
• What did the behaviour give me in that moment—relief, stimulation, distraction, comfort, avoidance, or something else?

The same behaviour can serve very different purposes for different people. Nail-biting might increase during boredom for one person and anxiety for another. Phone scrolling might be a way to avoid starting a difficult task or simply an automatic response to a notification.

Understanding the context gives you something concrete to change.

2. Track the Pattern for a Few Days

Memory is not always reliable when a behaviour happens automatically. Writing down a few examples can make the pattern easier to see.

You might record:

• when the habit happened;
• what triggered it;
• how strong the urge felt;
• what you did;
• what happened afterward;
• whether anything made the urge easier or harder to manage.

This does not need to become an elaborate spreadsheet. The point is to collect enough information to notice repeatable situations.

Tracking can also help distinguish an occasional annoyance from a behaviour that is significantly affecting health, relationships, work, school, finances, or daily functioning.

3. Change the Routine, Environment, or Response

Once you know the pattern, experiment with a small change that addresses the actual trigger.

For example:

• If you bite your nails while watching television, keep your hands occupied with another object.
• If you automatically check your phone during focused work, move it out of reach and turn off nonessential notifications.
• If procrastination starts when a task feels overwhelming, define a very small first step instead of trying to force yourself through the entire task at once.
• If a behaviour is linked to stress, test another short coping strategy—movement, breathing, contacting someone, or taking a planned break—and compare what happens.

Replacement strategies are not magic. They work best when they make the unwanted behaviour less automatic and the preferred behaviour easier to perform.

Do Not Treat Every Difficult Behaviour as a “Bad Habit”

Some behaviours need more than a habit-change strategy. Heavy alcohol use, nicotine dependence, self-harm, disordered eating, compulsive behaviours, or other patterns that involve significant health or safety concerns should not be reduced to a simple question of discipline.

Likewise, habits can be connected to anxiety, depression, ADHD, trauma, obsessive-compulsive symptoms, chronic stress, or other concerns. If a behaviour feels difficult to control or is causing meaningful harm, professional assessment or support may be appropriate.

Focus on Progress Rather Than Perfection

Changing a long-standing behaviour usually involves setbacks. One return to the old habit does not erase the progress you have made or prove that change is impossible.

Use setbacks as information: What was different that day? Was the trigger stronger? Was your replacement strategy unavailable? Do you need a different plan?

For more on how habits develop, see Three Phases of Forming a Habit.

Clinically reviewed by Steve Wilding, RP